Step 5 of 8 · Stop Overthinking
The Scheduled Worry Practice
The Scheduled Worry Practice
Step 5 · 12 min
🎬 Video lesson coming soon
There may be a category of thoughts in your loop that you haven't mentioned to anyone.
Not the ordinary worry thoughts. Something else — a thought that alarmed you when it arrived. Something violent, or sexual, or shameful, or sacrilegious, or terrifying. A thought that made you think: what does it say about me that I had that?
This lesson is for you specifically.
And the first thing it wants to say is: you are not unusual. You are not disturbed. You are not dangerous.
You are human.
Rachman's research: 90%+ of people have intrusive thoughts, including violent, sexual, or blasphemous ones
The content of intrusive thoughts is not a message about your character or desires
Salkovskis' model: the problem is not the thought but the misappraisal of its meaning
Acceptance without engagement: the thought can exist without being acted on or giving evidence about you
Stanley Rachman, one of the most influential cognitive psychologists of the twentieth century, conducted a landmark study asking ordinary people — students, professionals, parents — whether they ever had intrusive thoughts they found repugnant or distressing. The results were startling to many: over 90% of people reported having intrusive thoughts that were sexual, violent, blasphemous, or otherwise disturbing.
The content of these thoughts spans the full range of human darkness. Thoughts of harming people they love. Sexual thoughts about inappropriate people. Blasphemous thoughts about religious figures. Fears of acting out in public. Thoughts of death, decay, danger.
These thoughts are not wishes. They are not messages from the unconscious about suppressed desires. They are mental noise — the random output of a brain that is constantly generating possibilities, including catastrophic and disturbing ones.
Paul Salkovskis' research on OCD and intrusive thoughts identified the critical mechanism: the thought itself is not the problem. The problem is the misappraisal — the belief that having the thought means something about you. "I had a thought of hurting my child — I must be a monster." "I had a sexual thought about my colleague — I must be immoral." "I had a blasphemous thought — I must be damned."
The misappraisal triggers shame and distress. The shame triggers desperate thought suppression. The thought suppression (Wegner) amplifies the thought. The amplification seems to confirm the misappraisal. A vicious cycle.
The exit: acknowledge the thought without misappraisal. "My brain just generated a disturbing thought. This is normal. It doesn't mean anything about me." Then let it pass.
Find a comfortable position · Read slowly
If you have a thought in your loop that disturbs or shames you, can you name what misappraisal you are making about it?
"Because I had the thought that ___, I have been telling myself that I ___."
Now offer the more accurate appraisal: "The presence of this thought is normal. It is mental noise. It tells me nothing about who I am or what I would choose to do."
Breathe. Let the thought be present without chasing it or fleeing it.
You are not your most disturbing thought. No one is.
The thoughts that frighten you the most are almost never the truest reflection of who you are. They are the brain's edge-case generation — producing possibilities the way a scanner does, without intention or endorsement. You get to choose what you do with them. And you always have.